Picky eaters are born, not bred

January 25, 2020·Darcie

J J Goode has co-written several books in the EYB Library, including Pok Pok: Food and Stories from the Streets, Homes, and Roadside Restaurants of Thailand (with Andy Ricker) and A Girl and Her Greens: Hearty Meals from the Garden (with April Bloomfield). Since he was a consummate food lover, Goode had visions of raising children who shared his broad palate. His kids, however, had other ideas.

Goode thought he was being realistic with his expectations. "I wasn’t one of those monsters who assumed that his 3-year-old would clamor for slow-roasted salmon," he says. "But I was sure I would avoid becoming a peanut-butter-and-jelly parent." Given enough exposure to quality food, Goode surmised, his kids would develop into adventurous eaters. It did not work out that way.

Anyone who has raised a fussy eater will commiserate with Goode as he recounts his adventures cooking for his two young children. Despite cooking and pureeing his own baby food and using all of the tricks he gleaned at the elbows of some of world's top chefs, Goode confesses that "for the most part, all my efforts had created the same finicky, food-flinging, gummy-bear-addicted heathen raised by my unenlightened friends."

Even though the reality of cooking for his kids did not comport with his imagination, Goode has found a strategy that works for his family. Perhaps as they get older, they will learn to love food the way that he does. In the meantime,

5 comments

sir_ken_gJanuary 25, 2020

I suspect that our household sees a highly diverse array of food compared to most. And yes our kid started out finicky anyway - that is just the way they are. However they grew out of that and when they got to school and university they were appalled at the narrow food tastes of their piers. They have gradually been quite successful in enlightening their spouse.
On the other hand finicky can be taught. We have a finicky inlaw who has passed that onto their kids.

JaneJanuary 25, 2020

As someone who had two picky eaters I commiserate. I did everything you are meant to do when they were babies/toddlers but as soon they could state an opinion, they became horrors to feed. They are much better now they are in their 20s though still have a few things they won't eat. I loved the comments from the self-righteous parents who thought it was their expert parenting that meant they raised good eaters. No, you were just lucky!

hillsboroksJanuary 25, 2020

When my two kids were very young I was still cooking pretty basic fare from Betty Crocker's cookbook and stuff from our garden. They had a few quibbles with certain veggies (neither one will eat tomatoes to this day) but didn't drive me crazy with picky eating. The wonderful thing was when they hit junior high and I was branching out to cooking more exotic fare they were ready to go along with it. It became a badge of honor to be able to tell their friends they had had squid for dinner or oysters or other fun stuff. I think the reactions of the other kids encouraged them to be even more adventurous eaters. Some of their friends never made it beyond peanut butter and jelly, mac and cheese, and pizza. We talk about it now and how boring and restricting that must be in their adult life.

ShelmarJanuary 26, 2020

We used the phrase, you don’t have to like it, you only have to eat it. They quickly learned to try small portions of new things. We also explained that they might one day have to eat something awful a potential employer or in-law had made, so they should be able to eat everything. That being said, all of my children have food sensitivities, allergies, or intolerances, so they were taught how to advocate for food that did not make them sick. They all have food they don’t love, but are adventurous eaters as adults.

MarciKJanuary 27, 2020

Well this definitely resonates with me. Strange thing is, as picky as my son is, he would have been ok with salmon, but can't stand peanut butter to this day. As a kid, he liked brain, but threw up when he was made to eat peas. Even now he is a young adult who eats sushi but not ketchup.